True Badasses

Merriam-Webster: badass-chiefly US,  informal + sometimes offensive  :of formidable strength or skill

On sunday, October, 1, 2017, the Houston Texans soundly defeated the Tennessee Titans by an overwhelming score of 57-14.  The highlight of the game was the performance of Texans rookie quarterback Deshaun Watson.  Watson threw four touchdown passes and ran for another in the victory.  Texans fans took to social media to proclaim Watson the savior of Texans football, a man among men, and a total badass.  While Watson is a truly gifted player, an incredible young man (he recently donated his first game check to Texans cafeteria workers who were affected by Hurricane Harvey), and perhaps the future of the Texans franchise, he is not a badass.  Yesterday, I had to opportunity to meet John and Jane*, two authentic, real life badasses.  

I was introduced to John and Jane at a suicide awareness event I attended.  On the surface, John and Jane look like your average suburban high school kids, but their stories are what earned my admiration.  John stood in front of a crowd of strangers and told his story about attempting to take his life.  He talked about his battle with mental health issues and how he finally reached his breaking point.  He spoke openly and honestly of his life since that day, how he is coping and going on with his life.  John is a badass.  Talking about your struggles with mental health takes guts.  In our society, people generally don't want to hear about mental health.  Sadly, they equate mental health with insanity due to the lack of understanding.  Then John talked about attempting to take his life.  He broke down several times, but managed to get his story out.  Not only is John still walking the Earth, but he is recovering.  No doubt his life is a daily struggle, but John perseveres.  He gets up every morning and faces the same demons that have haunted him, but now he is fighting back.  John is a total and complete badass.  

The other badass I met was Jane.  Jane talked about her childhood, how she grew up with a negligent mother, how she lived in poverty, how she was harassed on a daily basis at school because of her clothes and her weight.  Jane told us how she would cut herself to trade one pain she could dictate and control for another she couldn't.  She told about meeting a Bob* her freshman year of high school.  How they bonded, and how that bond grew.  How she finally felt accepted and cared for by Bob even though Bob was fighting his own demons.  Then Jane told about how Bob took his life.  For a teenage girl, Jane was wise beyond her years.  She has lived with more crap in her young life than most people deal with in their entire lives.  But because Jane is a badass, rather than give into her demons, she fought back against them and now uses her story to inspire others.  Jane too, is a total and complete badass.  

Our world is full of badasses, but these badasses don't throw touchdown passes, hit home runs, dunk a basketball, or shred a sick solo on a guitar.  The badasses I'm talking about fight daily to stay live.  The battle to silence the voices in their head that try to convince them that the world would be a better place without them, voices that tell them how happy their family would be to be relieved of the burden they have become.  They live with an emotional pain as crippling as any disease known to man, but they go on despite it.  They live with an illness that is shunned by society, but takes more young lives than cancer and heart disease.  They are told they should just be happy, think positive thoughts, or to stop feeling sorry for themselves.  They have to resist the urge to cut themselves, turn to drugs, alcohol, or other addictions to ease their pain.  They are young and old. They are male and female.  They are black, white, hispanic, Native American, Asian, and every other race and nationality.  They are mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, cousins, friends, neighbors, classmates, and coworkers.  They may sit next to you in class, in the office, in a restaurant, or on the bus.  They may wear a badge, a uniform, a suit, or hand me downs.  They may teach your kids, or even be your kids.  


The next time you decide to throw around the term badass, stop and think.  In the United States, approximately 44,000 badasses lose their battle every year, but so many more, like John and Jane, continue to fight on.  For all those out there fighting the battle to stay alive every day, you are my heroes, my badasses.